The Only Good News From The 2021 Election Post Mortem Is That Nobody Actually Died

Federal Election 2021 was like ‘Christmas in September’ in which nobody got what they wanted. Erin O’Toole looked like the kid Santa knew to be more nice than naughty, but then he went all ‘wishy washy’ and blew that image. Jagmeet Singh should have been rewarded for his good behaviour and honest intentions. His present involved coal. Annamie Paul bit one of her playmates and was ordered to sit in the corner for 36 days.
Justin Trudeau was revealed to be the one who hatched the whole snow job just to get the biggest and best gift. Santa gave him the same gift as last Christmas… and it didn’t fit him then either.
Maxime Bernier wanted a white-only Christmas and instead he got heat and humidity. Yves-Francois Blanchet had a dream that 40 of Santa’s helpers would materialize to help him destroy Canada but only 31 showed up.
It was the worst party ever and now the Canadian public, more angry and divided than before, will have to pay the caterer’s $600 million tab.
Nothing changed. It was like instead of a pissed-off public who vowed to throw da bums out, just threw da old bums back in!
Oh sure we took Trudeau to the woodshed for yet another bonehead decision and sent him to his room without his majority. But he’s still the prime minister, still dependent on the NDP to get anything done.
Yes, we flirted with O’Toole until what he said and what he meant didn’t match up. When he embraced the formerly-disgraced Brian Mulroney many saw the resemblance.
Championing anti-immigration, anti-vaccination and attacks on doctors and nurses, Maxime Bernier did very well by cleverly corralling the ugly vote and winning 5% of them nationally. That’s one and a half million Canadians who believe hate and division is the path to take as we move forward into the unknown. In his mind, Maxime Bernier won his own seat however Elections Canada does not recognize the planet Mars as a legitimate electoral riding
There was news both good and bad. The bad news is, those horrid campaign incidents confirmed we have a segment of our population, maybe as high as 10%, that is every bit as angry uneducated and falsely informed as Donald Trump’s cult followers in America. There is no place in the society of any free country for campaign violence, stone throwing, Swastikas, nooses, “F_ _K” signs, death threats and shouts referring to the prime minister’s wife a “whore.” Such vulgar, violent and outrageous behaviour would not be acceptable in a third-world country let alone a nation that up until now, has been considered a civil, safe and reasonable caretaker of democracy.
The good news is that the rules we live and vote by are still intact and about to become a teaching moment for the crass and aggrieved lawbreakers. Shane Marshall, 25 of London, Ontario has been charged with assault with a weapon for throwing gravel at Prime Minister Justin Trudeau at a Labour Day campaign stop and hopefully… he will be made an example of. The only place for public lawlessness and vigilantism is jail.
The bad news is public persecution of our politicians by the “anti-everything good” included the horrible harassment of nurses, doctors, chemo patients and ambulance drivers is about to be taken seriously by the way-too-polite police. Kid gloves need to be replaced by handcuffs because these are serious crimes against innocent hard working citizens who deserve our heartfelt support instead personal attacks and intimidation.
The good news is Erin O’Toole almost grew into the role as Conservative leader. The bad news question remains – why can’t the Canadian right find a trustworthy and charismatic candidate to attract the disgruntled left?
The bad news is that the party with Canada’s best interest at heart lost. The good news is Jagmeet Singh earned the MVP award for honesty and integrity in an election that was pretty much void of both. In the coming days Singh’s popularity will rise as surely as Trudeau’s will slump.
The bad news is extreme climate change, the single most dangerous threat to our way of life was ping-ponged about but not advanced or enhanced. The good news is Toronto voters put Annamie Paul out of her misery.
The good news is many candidates withstood the taunts and threats of Canada’s emerging ‘hate brigade’. But they’re wounded and afraid. The bad news is the only candidates who will run in future elections will be thick skinned, insensitive people… who are now doing the taunting and threatening.
The good news is Canadians survived an ugly and unnecessary democratic experience. The bad news is that the next prime minister who calls a snap election will have to campaign in exile from the islands of Saint-Pierre and Miquelon.
The bad news is that many Canadians who voted were not well informed about the issues or the candidates. The odd news is, that due to the timing of the event, many people, following the lawn signs… voted for Terry Fox.
The bad news is that the People’s Party of Canada garnered more national support than the Green Party. Good news: “Trump got booed!” When the former president finally spoke a truth at a rally in Alabama, encouraging his followers to get vaccinated, they actually booed the God of conspiracies and lies. Heads up “Mad Max” because when your gullible gang realize they’ve been used and lied to, the target goes on your back.
The good news is that Maxime Bernier’s “Say NO to mass immigration” billboard had to be taken down due to public outrage. The bad news is that his new slogan “May the flat earth rise to meet you” — okay, that one I made up. The rest is sadly true.

For a comment or a signed copy of The Dog Rules – Damn Near Everything email: williamjthomas@gmail.com

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